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Likes: Ryan Gosling, Pandas On Unicycles, and the Floor


Hi! I'm so glad you're here! Now that you are...

Here's Something You Should Know

Don't tempt the fates. Don't do it. Especially in an online forum like, say, a blog where you might want to boast about how well things are going. This is the digital equivalent of inviting the gods of Melodramatic Emotion to smite you, possibly by prompting you to water a friend's carpet with your tears instead of doing the things you should be doing like, say, earning a living or being a responsible human being who's not lying prone on the floor on a Wednesday afternoon.

Lessons One Might Learn From This Experience, If One Were The Type Of Person To Search For Lessons In Everything. Which, Of Course, I Am.

1) A floor is an excellent thing to have. It's nonjudgmental, will hold your head as you cry, and catches things you drop. Check under your feet right now. Is there a floor there? Good. You now have all the support you ever need. I strongly recommend lying on that floor whenever you feel fragile.

2) Just because things don't happen when you think they'll happen doesn't mean they won't happen ever. If this applies to the short-lived but intense emotional breakdown one might have expected for six weeks while giving up one's apartment, packing up said apartment, leaving family and friends and moving to LA, it probably applies to other things as well. Like new jobs, new relationships, new apartments, that elusive pair of perfect boots that make your calves svelte and make your feet dry. All of these things could appear at any moment, no matter how long you've already been waiting. So if there's anything you want...may I recommend giving up on it? You can lie on the floor while you do.

All This To Say

Give up, get the thing. Isn't that strangely heartening?

Also: IT GETS BETTER, FLOOR CRIERS. The floor is there for you. A few minutes or a few hours later, you'll remember that there are nice things in the world, like tomato soup and pandas on unicycles and movies with Ryan Gosling and nice friends who will make you tomato soup and support you when you proclaim the work day done at 3 p.m. so you can go see a movie with Ryan Gosling.

In Closing, LA Was Absolutely The Right Choice, Even With That Crying On The Floor Thing. Also, Pandas On Unicycles Rule.

Did I mention that I'm glad you're here? Well, I am. I hope you stick around.